Quote# 103934
I trained longer, And still got nothing.
So i will now rip it from the earth by force, and no sorcerer, priestess, or druid is going to stop me from getting what i deserve
I will never accept being a nobody, even if i have to burn down the astral plains to a big pile of dust in order to get what i want.
I will not be the prey of some cruel and heartless earth spirit.
nobody
I cant.
I will not be some kind of subserviant lap dog to some self serving (....) becuase she/he is born with actual ACTIVE natural skills, rather than passive ones.
The ones that bullied me did so becuase i was not gifted at birth with their magical skills, and thusly an easy prey.
And they most certainly did think of themselves as worth more than those who didn't.
And of course it comes more from the bullying and abuse i have suffered.
I know and its not your fault its mine, since i cant get my thoughts inline at times.
So here is the cold truth: I have tried psychologists but they could only help me for a while, despite some of them where kinda nice, and after that the fear and the chaos returned to my mind, and medication only made things worse.
When i was beaten up i was not just traumatised.
Spirituality/magic is my life, it is the reason for which i was born.
That is what they took from me, at one of my weakest moments.
I tried to get better at bending energy for years and i hated myself for constantly failing at it, and got a bit cynical at times to say the least.
Its not a nice truth but there you go.
I hate psychologists.. Calling my energy work a hallicunation.
And did invent the magical intermediate so why not try to make a horcrux? (If possible without murder)
I am not just mindlessly accepting being digested because its "The natural way of things", i am not giving up my soul/spirit just because some spirit tells me to.
I am not that submissive.
My soul is not food for the "gods".
I would rather wonder around in hell forever than cease to exist after having been eaten by some spiritual titan monster if you understand me.
Thrak,
ecauldron 47 Comments [10/6/2014 3:03:34 AM]
Fundie Index: 16
Submitted By: The-Dood